The AXE End of the World Survival Kit

Fig. 1

The AXE people seemed to have taken the Mayan Doomsday prophecy waaay too seriously. Based on the Mayan prediction, the world will end on 12-21-12, so it was no surprise that I have received an End of the World Survival Kit from AXE (Fig. 1). 

Perplexed, I opened the box, wondering what AXE threw in together to help me "survive the end of the world." So I lifted the cover of the box...and the items I found inside were utterly unexpected. I stared at them in disbelief. Yup, they definitely look like something out of an adult store! A silky black scarf-like material (Fig. 2); a pair of fur-lined handcuffs (Fig. 3), a small bottle of fuel (Fig. 4), a golden velvet rope (Fig. 5), and the Final Edition of AXE body spray (Fig. 6). Hmmm... And there was a small folded manual inside wishing me a "Happy End of the World," with luuurve tips. I glanced back at the suspicious items...Seems to me that AXE is encouraging me to score some dudes and get some action to survive the end of the world happy.

Cleverly, though, the love stuff can be alternatively used as survival tools. Of course, AXE has made sure that you face Doomsday the sexy way-- but at the same time keep you alive and safe in the midst of their perceived end-of-the-world scenario: the silky scarf could be used a tourniquet; the handcuffs to keep you secured to some post, or to keep you from being separated from your loved one; the velvet rope, you can use to tie stuff together, I guess; the fuel to build fire; and of course, the body spray in citrus scent to distract you from the chaos and madness around you. Whatever creative way you want to use these items, well, you're free to do so...

AXE has also prepared a video guide to help mankind survive the end of the world: 

AXE 2012: End of the World Survival Guide

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Note: The following day, though, I woke up to find out that my sister had ripped the furr off the handcuffs and brought them to school to play cops and robbers with her classmates; the golden velvet rope was already tied in a pretty bow around the neck of our lovely cat; the scarf folded and mixed with the laundry, the body spray on my father's night table, and only the bottle of fuel left inside the survival box. Hmmm.... I guess I'd have to face the end of the world with only my bare soul!